telemarketers

[TheBlizzard]

I just scream really really loud in their ear. And then hang up.

CRAIG

[WildJokers]

Telemarketers are very annoying. I would bet we get about 20 to 30 calls a day at my house from them. I have threatened, cussed, ignored, you name it and they dont get the hint.

[dylan]

right when they ask for you just tell them you are the persons brother and they passed away last night because a telemarketer called him while he was driving home and got in to an accident and died. then ask if they are happy with what they did.

[A//// Guy]

Just tell them your parents arent home, or start speaking chinese or something.

Ive started speaking Polish to them haha.

Most of the time I just hangup.

[MATCHBX]

I used to start speaking Norwegian. After a while they just get frustrated and end the call.

One piece of advice, NEVER say the word "yes" or "yeah". They could start sending you stuff and all they have to do is rework the recording so you say yes to all the right questions. Yes, it's illegal, but it's your word against theirs and they have a recording of your voice on their side.

I like the "put them on hold" routine also.

[Shotgun!]

Just tell them to put you on the DoNotCall List. If they still call you after that, they can be fined $10k if it's the same company.

The list thing is a joke. I had one guy that was very mean and nasty to me and then said he was on the National Do Not Call List. I called him seven times on that shift alone. Finally I was able to talk to his wife or son (I can't remember which) and ended up selling him or her. I'm sure he was mad when he found the $140 charge on his Visa...
The only way I would take a number outa the list was if the person was dead and no one was there to handle the account. If you have a telemarketer on the phone and really want them off, just say "Dispo the account name as deceased". I always would for them.

[niterydr]

The list thing is a joke. I had one guy that was very mean and nasty to me and then said he was on the National Do Not Call List. I called him seven times on that shift alone. Finally I was able to talk to his wife or son (I can't remember which) and ended up selling him or her. I'm sure he was mad when he found the $140 charge on his Visa...
The only way I would take a number outa the list was if the person was dead and no one was there to handle the account. If you have a telemarketer on the phone and really want them off, just say "Dispo the account name as deceased". I always would for them.
yupp, the problem with the 'list' is most of the telemarkers don't care for the company they work for, just want the $$, so they only take out leads that are 'dead' (one way or the other).
The repeater game works, so does the different language. I usually just hang up on them.

[2003eclipse]

3. Can I ask you what industry you work in? PORNO
5. Is there anyone else at your company that you think would be interested? SOMEONE YOU HATE

[AJ]

I still love to fuck with them over the phone if I have the time. And I have plenty latly and the calls are flowing in. So I wait for the righ tone to answer and the last guy I did fuck with went something like this :

TM : hello sir
ME : hold on
TM : ok
ME : head to toliet, wait a few min, flush
ME : ok, I'm back
TM : ok sir, we have this new....
ME : sorry, be right back one more time.
ME : growning, moaning, flush noise.

RINSE AND REPEAT. Generally they can't hang up, so after a bit if you get bored just say something like " oh shit i'm gonna explode" or hold the phone in the toliet a bit and yell into it " FUCK the phones covered in SHIT NOW". then flush and hang up.

[tpunx99GSX]

1. Hello sir, would you like to renew your free subscription to *** magazine?

2. All I need is to update your information, and we can get this out to you.

3. Can I ask you what industry you work in?

4. Let me tell you why this magazine is perfect for you.

5. Is there anyone else at your company that you think would be interested?

There's alot more that I will think of later (I need to get back to work), but how would you respond to these?
1. Ill only subscribe if you ask me politely.. after he/she asks again, repeat.
2. I dunno, whats the address to the Hennipin county jail because im gonna be there for 1 year.
3. Im a hooker on the corner of 5th and hennipin.
4. respond with "Let me tell you why this magazine would be thrown in the fireplace every time i get it"
5. well if they are gonna get annoying calls like this, then prolly a big NO.

I think the best is when you start talking dirty to her/him. we did this with Credit card companies when i was in college, it was funny, this poor girl was on speaker phone with my roomate and he got really dirty with her saying things like "yeah baby i want you to put your finger in my asshole, thats so sexy, damn im getting so horny just hearing your voice, im totally naked right now and stroking myself because of your voice is turning me on so much right now." LOL she ended up hanging up after like 5 minutes.