What would you do in this situation

[crazy_skier]

well my friend finally got out of a 3 year relationship this past month... kind of simialer to your situation and I kept telling him to just bail (she was also cheating) but he loved her and stayed in town and went to alex tech instead of going to the u of m like his original plans. not saying that is bad but it was a waste of a year for him, and it made me listen to him mope his ass off countless night and now he smokes because of her.... just think about it and try not to even think about her for the rest of the time even though it will be really hard, and if it works out great. Oh yeah, women come and go... friends not so easily... it was me and one other person that really hung out with him towards the end of the relationship because everyone else bailed.... and my "older" brother (neighbor since 5 2 years older) did the same thing and when he was done he had even forgot some peoples names.... just an fyi from another 18 year old

[MitsuChick]

It's not even a real restraining order, hence why it was only 3 months, usually the minimum for a restraining order is 2 years in maine and it's called "emotional distress"


Ha, and you would know they are normally 2 years why?

[JamieSophia14]

Ha, and you would know they are normally 2 years why?

because I researched the website, the pamplet stated that, the judge said she was knocking it down from 2 years to 3 months, and my school officer talked to me to see how I was doing cause my gf had called him to see if there was anthing she could do, and he said in his 30 years he had never once seen a 3 month restraining order, they had always been 2 years.

[sleepy2lazy]

Heh. After reading all this shit, I think your just another one of them pussy whooped boys. I don't know you so I maybe wrong.

If I were you, and this situation came up, I would live my day doing my own things and carry on until the restraining order is up. When its up, I'd talk to her again. We'd date. Go out, hangout, do whatever. But i'd still be doing whatever I'm doing. Being devoted to one woman, doesn't mean your entire world revolves around her. Seeing as your pretty worked up about the restraining order, your world does revolve around her.

Investing 2 years in her doesn't mean that you should keep going with an investment. If it gets sour, toss it. Time length is pointless with intangible objects. But, if you do plan to stick with her, don't marry her until your at least 23-24 like others said. Times change. If you or her plan to go to college, that can change you two as well.

Restraining orders are nothing. In the asian community, ever hear of forced marriages? For head over heels people, this kinda shit happens alot. I was in this kinda situation 3 years ago, when I was 18, with this chick I was dating for about 2 years. I took her home after a movie, so it was around 10pm she got home., I was forced to go into their house and have a "talk" with her rents. Given a choice of marriage, or leaving it, and I said no and left. Looking back, I'm happy that I didn't take it.

Love comes and goes, its fickle. I wouldn't bust my ass for a woman unless she truly loves me. And that ain't gonna happen unless she takes the final step and marries me. Why? Because the stress that can happen during the dating stages aren't really necessary in life. Be precautious. Live it, love it, but don't submit to it unless your ass spends 1k+ on a stupid little ring to put on her finger, then giving her your checking account to buy everything else she wants.

[JET]

Your past "investment" in her is a sunk cost, you are never getting that back no matter what. You can take that and toss it out the window. If you know the relationship won't work, it is best to bail right away instead of putting more time into it. You don't think this is the case with you, but I agree it does sound like you are pretty whipped.

[JamieSophia14]

I'm not really whipped, but more of committed. I don't know it's hard to explain, I've been in the position where I was with a different girl every week getting laid. Then I got into this situation, and I felt strong for her, and it felt good to have someone you know cared about you and not your penis, someone you can depend on and lean on when you needed it. So I may be whipped a little bit, but ahh IDK haha.

[Kracka]

I've been in the position where I was with a different girl every week getting laid.

I like to call those the glory days. You'll miss them, trust me :)

[JamieSophia14]

I just thought I'd update you guys, even though ypu guys prolly don't care. Me and my girl made it through, and her parents actually lightened up and let go, We've hung out the past 4 days and its been amazing.

[Halon]

Sweet deal dude. My girl dumped me. Screw dem hoes!

[SpiceyOrange]

Glad things worked out for you.....You cant really listen to many people. I got some great advice from my mom when I was in a terrible relationship

"I can give you all the advice you want to hear, you wont listen to me, you can only listen to your heart and learn for yourself before you acutally know what you need"

And After I went through what I did....I look back and realize shes right..

Best of luck to you!
Sarah